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The new home of "The Frank Report."
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"I'd rather have a few moments of wonderful, than a lifetime of nothing special."
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"People are more violently opposed to fur than to leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs." - Rodney Lee
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Friday, March 28, 2003
Life In DC Continues
Saw former NYC police commissioner, Bernard Kerik at Union Station today. Always makes me feel like something of an "insider" when I spot someone famous on the move in DC - like Newt Gingrich shuffling along in a baggy suit and bad shoes on the sidewalk, or a certain famous talk-show host ogling teenage boys at a pizzeria. I resisted the impulse to go up and ask if he was here on specific business (ie - potential terror attack) - figure he's here to just to do some talking-head appearance on TV.
I spent most of lunch watching a guy from across the room while pretending to read a magazine. It's been a long time since I've seen anyone look truly devastated, completely run down by despair and grief. Normally those types of public appearances are limited to funerals or natural disasters. His eyes were puffy and he maintained his heroic resolve in holding back tears even while slumped in the chair completely defeated. Of course, I didn't inquire if he was alright or offer assistance - you just don't do that in the big city. Besides, I had to get back to the office to play the next round of our favorite game: "Guess who's an alcoholic." (Answer: Not me.) On the way back, I passed by the same homeless people I always do, one of whom was waking up and getting dressed to start his day. Zero bodyfat on this man, I kid you not, the body of a professional decathalete. G-d is cruel and capricious when He hands out His blessings. The combination of intrusive too-real realities (famous people on-the-go; open, real emotions) has made it harder for me to concentrate on work today which (and rightfully so) seems frivolous in comparison. So now I'm in a crappy mood - not that I needed much prompting to begin with this week. Reading the latest about the antics of the French, Iraqi's and protestors hasn't helped. Tonight it's back to the gym. If I sweat and work hard enough, maybe someday I'll be as buff as someone who sleeps under a pile a newspapers on the sidewalk.
Wednesday, March 26, 2003
Death and McDonald's
McDonald's is having another one of their mindless scratch-and-sniff promotional games. Before you say it, yes, I know I shouldn't even be thinking of going to McDonald's let alone eating their bilious crap, but even the obsessively weight-loss minded need some comfort food when there's the threat of ricin being dumped in the METRO system.
I digress. The name of the contest is "Winning Time" and losers (like myself) are rewarded with the message: "Sorry, it wasn't your time." Which immediately made me think of death, as in, "it was just her time" or "his time was up." So rather than curse the fates for being denied a much deserved free small order of victory fries, I have decided, through the power of positive thinking, to look at this as a blessing. Is it possible that a corporation as huge and powerful as McDonalds possesses power over life and death itself? (Over 3 trillion served - think about that for a moment - just the type of thing you would expect the Grim Reaper to say.) The health Nazi's argue (rightly) that eating Mikey D's will hasten the inevitable end. Perhaps today's "golden ticket" was a warning. "Sorry, it wasn't your time," but if you continue to eat here you fat fool, you're going to die of a heart attack. At least there wasn't a picture of post-apocalyptic Charlton Heston on the label advertising "Now with Soylent Green!"
Orange Alert in the Nation's Capitol
The cherry blossoms are beginning to bloom, so for those of you who never visit (and never will) next week would be the ideal time to make your trip. The weather has been unseasonably beautiful; gorgeous in a southern California kinda way. With the absence of tourists, lets just say that I've got my own little slice of Heaven goin' on.
Like most people my nights are filled with watching the news and surfing news-commentary web sites (when I should be doing cardio.) So, as has been the trend lately, not much new to report. The helicopter and jet fighter sorties have calmed down as have the protestor-related convoy's of screaming sirens through the city. I've finally achieved the mundane, normal, low-stress, low-maintenance life I always wanted and its boring me to tears. ...But, me being me, I've got some ideas in the hopper that might just spice things up. I'll keep everyone posted.
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